Equality. It’s a major buzzword right now, and yeah, it’s an important one. A person is a person, no one should be held above another. This isn’t/shouldn’t be contingent upon race, gender, ethnicity, sexual preferences, favorite baseball team, etc. Right?
Equality is a noun, meaning the state of being equal, especially in status or quality. Equal as an adjective, which is how it’s intended to be used with human differences, means having the same as another in status, rights, or opportunities. So, for example, a goal of equality with gender would be that a female has the same value in status as a man, the same quality of rights, the same types of opportunities. Right?
Right. The SAME. Not better. Not more than. Not greater than.
THE SAME.
I am completely behind the premise that women and men should be on the same, level playing field as far as job opportunities, job pay, rights, and all that. But so often in recent years (decades?) the trend has been shifting from women demanding voting rights and equal pay (both great things) to groups of women demanding MORE rights and special treatment than men, and MORE pay. To be treated as higher in value than men.
That’s not Equality. That’s Greater Than.
You know how everyone can’t stand the girl that has to make other girls feel like crap to make herself feel good? That’s what every single feminist is doing today. But, instead of other girls, they’re making boys feel like crap to make themselves feel good. (by the by- I am hopefully exaggerating when I say “every single feminist.”)
Yes, girls are awesome. Girls are strong. Girls are powerful. But so are boys. And that’s ok!
Women do not need to be lifted up by tearing men down. Women can’t expect men to treat them with respect and equality if women don’t treat men the same way. That’s not how it works, and most people learned that basic principle in, like, preschool. You know, that whole “treat others how you want to be treated” thing. That means, if you demand to be treated with respect, as everyone really should, then treat other people that same way. But that means everyone; you can’t pick and choose based on what reproductive body parts a person has.
All these “the future is female” shirts and hats and bumper stickers and socks make me really worry about said future. Not because I don’t think women can handle being in charge or whatever, but because the future literally can not be all female, or humans will no longer exist. And, quite honestly, I don’t want to live in a world where we will always have gender oppression in some form.
I don’t understand why everything has to be a competition between the sexes. I mean, sure, on trivia night or game night, let’s play girls vs. boys. That’s just good fun. But in the actual game of life, like real life, not the game Life, let’s play girls and boys work together to make scientific and technological advances and become productive and valued members of society, raising families and spreading love and kindness for the betterment of all living beings. Let’s play that.
There is a children’s author that I absolutely LOVE. I may or may not have a slight obsession with her. Not in a sexual way, you perverts, but I have so much respect for her and the voice she has on social media, and the fact that she uses her voice for the good of our children. Children, as in girls…and boys. Both are important and both should be valued. Her name is Lisa Britton (@LisaBritton if you want some amazing and uplifting things in your Twitter and Instagram feed) and she has written several books for, you guessed it, both girls and boys. And, side note, guess what?? The covers of all of the girl books are PINK OR PURPLE! You know why? Because pink and purple are freakin traditionally girly colors, and there is nothing freakin wrong with girls liking girly colors! Women can be strong and still like pink (as I use my pink computer mouse to edit this document which is on my plain black laptop decorated with a combination of pink and turquoise floral stickers, fact checking on my phone with a pink and lace print case, wearing a bright ass pink shirt with a “Punisher” logo made by Relentless Defender, who primarily makes police and military shirts, for men. And I consider myself a pretty strong woman.).
Anyway, Lisa’s books and the things she shares on social media gives me hope that there are more people out there like me, and like her, who agree that we are actually hurting our girls by putting them above boys, and that we are definitely hurting our boys in that. And that this needs to be changed.
One example of her beautiful words: “If we truly want equality in our society, we should empower girls AND boys & encourage them all to be their best. Teach them that they’re capable of anything with hard work & determination regardless of their gender.” I mean, right?? I have two sons and a daughter, and I want all three of them to work hard in life and become the best adult humans they possibly can. Of course I want my daughter to be treated equally in society and in her career of choice, but I want that for my sons as well. Because boys matter too.
I’m all good with equal as an adjective for men and women, as I’ve stated. But, what is ridiculous is for women to demand to be “equal” as a verb, which means to be equivalent to. Because they’re not. They’re not equivalent. They’re different. Hear me out before you get pissed off at me.
These days people hear “different” when it comes to gender and they freak out. “No, girls and boys are the same! Treat them the same!”
No. I’m sorry, but no. Realistically, boys are different from girls. A boy does not equal a girl, and a girl does not equal a boy. They are different physically, physiologically, mentally. Not better, not worse. Different. So yes, equal as an adjective is good. Equality as a noun is good. But equal as a verb? No. Because they are not the same.
Men have higher standards than women on physical fitness tests. Because men are built differently than men. They naturally have bigger muscles than women, essentially making them stronger and better able to do push-ups, pull-ups, etc. Physiologically, women’s respiratory muscles consume more oxygen during exercise than men’s, which means they use more energy to run the same distance, making them slower or unable to run for as long as men at the same pace. Calm down, ladies…that’s not sexist, that’s science. And it’s not all inclusive. Obviously, some women can outrun men like crazy. Some women can lift several times what a man can. In the military and police academy, I did more push-ups and pull-ups than several of the men (couldn’t do that now, so don’t ask). But generally speaking, science wins.
Bottom line: Girls are awesome, and boys are too.
Men and women should be valued equally.
Men and women are not equal.
And that, my friends, is ok.
You’re awesome!
I love this very sensible article. Well done in conveying your thoughts. I agree one hundred percent.